Category Archives: Cycling

I Ride Alone

Posted on by

While it may come as a surprise to some, I have many friends some of whom are even real.  Many of those fine folks ride bicycles and yet I continue to find myself riding alone.  No, that’s not accurate – I ride alone to find myself.  It’s a choice.

Take Ken.  I’ve known Ken longer than I haven’t, since before we were old enough to drive.  That we’ve landed in the same new city, in the same industry and continue to enjoy each other’s company is one of life’s remarkable blessings.  Ken is family.  Ken is also nuts.  When he goes riding, he has an entirely different definition of riding than I do.  He loads his bike into a truck, hauls it to the top of a mountain and proceeds to fling it and himself off the mountian.  He is quite accomplished at this and routinely tops not only his age category but the entire field save one or two teenagers who still operate secure in the knowledge that they are indestructible and invincible.  Frankly I’m afraid to ride with Ken.

Ken's broken Canfield Jedi. Why I am afraid.

Or Rick.  Rick is another childhood friend that landed in the same city and can find it in his constitution to tolerate me, hence is also family.  Rick is a reformed recumbent rider.  Yeah…I know.  No, we don’t talk about it.  It was sad but he’s come back to the light and now owns a nice Canondale Lefty.  I’m not certain he rides it but he owns it which is really the first step through recumbent rehab.  We don’t ride together as his Charlie Harper lifestyle leaves little time for cycling these days.  Actually, I’m waiting until he’s fully recumbent-cured before sharing cycling space with him.  Don’t want to get any on me.

There’s Thomas.  Known local racer and avid rider.  Despite coming to work in stretchy pants and tap shoes any time it wasn’t raining (or snowing), I somehow missed his enthusiasm and had to discover cycling on my own.  He’s been a trusted resource for advice on cycling gear which I have promptly ignored every time because I am thick.  I did ride with Thomas for a couple of kilometres however his easy, chatty, no-handed spinning beside me while I struggled to keep up suggested this was not something that was going to be repeated.  It would kill me and bore him at the same time.

Adam – frequent and only non-blood-related commenter (thank you) and co-worker.  He too rides to work more days than he doesn’t but he didn’t always.  I mentioned one day that I was planning to ride to work soon – I was almost conditioned, almost ready to make the round trip and then I was going to bicycle commute!  He rode in the next morning stealing my imagined thunder.  Adam however was insturmental in goading me into making that first commute.  He arrives while the sun is still in bed and leaves correspondingly early, and travels east to my west.  That and he would ride me off his wheel before we got out of the parking lot are why we don’t ride together.  Sort of like Chris.

Chris works with Adam and I.  He is also the smallest guy I’ve ridden with (not a random observation, stick with me).  Chris Thomas’d me riding with no hands and happily chatting away as I tried to think of excuses for being out of breath almost immediately after we started.  He took the lead but it is nigh impossible for a man that is six feet tall and 220 pounds to draft behind someone who is considerably smaller.  Like a bear drafting rabbit.  I think he was taunting me.  Luckily for me Chris and I overlap our commute only briefly and that saves me from coming up with more excuses.

You know who I ride the most often with?  Of course you don’t.  Alberto.  Alberto works with Adam and Chris and I but he lives a mere kilometre away.  We run into each other at the same set of lights a few times a week and then sprint like madmen the remaining distance to work.  He, unwilling to get beat by a fat knocking-on-forty man with a backpack and I out to show the pretender wearing jeans that an old guy can in fact leave him behind.

Honourable mentions:

Bernie – a master’s degree, a penchant for fine muscle cars and one of the nicest, most unassuming people I know.  He wisely followed Thomas’ advice on bicycle selection and reports that his Devinci is a thing of beauty to ride.  Alas, he moved to the US to hang around the pool and as a fringe “benefit” has real-life gunplay drama unfold in front of him.

Wade – mechanical engineer, pending fatherhood status (congratulations!).  Also followed Thomas’ advice and picked up a nice Devinci Tosca then promptly moved to the US with Bernie.

Ben – with a smile on his face and a Frappaccino in his hand, he is one of the most  laid back individuals I know.  Yet another of those wise enough to take Thomas’ advice, he owns a bike however nobody has ever seen him ride it.  He’s talked about riding…

Point of note – all of the people above with the exception of one (who shall remain nameless, but his name rhymes with Lawmass) are incredibly laid back and all are generous to a fault.  I am lucky to know them, though they are much luckier to know me.  Goes without saying.

One of the coolest side-effects of making the decision to ride to work – apart from not sitting in traffic, not spending money on fuel, dropping 25+ pounds, building new muscles in my legs and generally just feeling awesome?  There’s the 1710 riders group now.  1710 is our division’s internal identifier and our group?  Out of 36 staff, 3 of us ride to work daily, a 4th at least once a week and a 5th has started.  2 more have inquired about time and gear and how to do it (just do it).  5 months ago, nobody rode to work and today?  More than 10%!  How cool is that?  Beyond that, despite his comment to the contrary, my dad has expressed an interest in riding again and my sister has already started riding.  Best Wife rides despite desperately needing a better bike, complete with 100 pounds of trailer and children latched on behind her (one of whom gets a kick out of dragging her foot on mommy’s wheel).

I am surrounded by cycling goodness!  How great is my life?  Pretty damn great.  I will continue to spend my rides alone however.  It is a respite from the noise of a house with three children.  It is time to clear my head, stare at my pumping knees and feed the suffering.

My Kryptonite

Posted on by

Due to a late start Thursday, I didn’t get the opportunity to chase down my purple rabbit as I assume he was already at work while I was late.  Perhaps Friday.

Kryptonite.  You evil thing, seeking to unhinge my success, subvert my path and bring me back from whence I’ve come.

When I started cycling, it was out of pure exhilaration and enjoyment.    Even now the anticipation of riding gets me excited be it my routine commute or my next great cycling adventure (read abandoning the family for hours of solo time).  Along the way I lost some weight.  And I kept losing so I started to pay attention.  I’ve managed to drop 25 pounds, 30 if you stop checking at the post-70km weigh-in but prudence dictated I put some fluids back (even if they were sneak-attack pickle juice fluids).

So now I’m hovering around my wedding weight – the weight I had before the road trip home to visit childhood friends and my parents before moving overseas.  The road trip where we left Hay River with more home-made cookies than any party of 12 needs.  The road trip where we sat in Best (new) Wife’s VW Rabbit and ate home-made cookies for 1000 miles.   Despite my efforts over the ensuing 11 years I never quite recovered and indeed fell further into the abyss.   From a gym-built 205 when we got married to a cookie-and-laziness-built 205, 210 then 215.  Since I’d first set foot in the gym a flabby 175 pounds, I dreamed about being 220 but not this kind of 220.  Then 225.  Then 230.  Urgh…  How do I stop this train?

If you’ve already done the math I don’t need to say I’m down to a cycling-built 205 again.  Just under actually.  I was here more than two weeks ago too but then an evil genius salesman dropped three boxes of Kryptonite on my desk.  I resisted at first but eventually I couldn’t help myself.  One peek in the box couldn’t hurt.  I might as well peek in the other boxes too – no point leaving them feeling left out.  I’ll just open them all up for everyone else.

iPhone photos make doughnuts look unappetizing...I wonder how I can work that.

At first it’s the smell.  Warm (how do they make a smell warm?) and intoxicating, the most powerful of its many weapons.  It begins to break down the brain’s defences and immediately you find yourself struggling, struggling, resistance waning, resolve melting like snow on a red-hot woodstove.  My willpower at the breaking point, I scanned the 36 doughnuts laid out in front of me and picked up a jam-filled dutchie.  And then a liquid-sugar glazed wonder of mouth-delight, a chocolate-covered crème-filled sensory overload and finally a tractor tire (cruller I believe they’re called…or rather crueller).   1120 calories.  That’s a full third (or more) of a reasonable food intake for a moderately active guy trying to lose weight.  You’d think that would be enough to guilt a guy into some culinary discipline once more but that’s not how I work – sometimes ya just  gotta hit the bottom first.

I don’t remember everything that I plowed into my piehole but I recall the last 2 inches of frozen yogurt in the bucket, more home-made cookies than I can count, extra servings of Best Wife’s unbelievably good cooking…I was a man on a mission of gluttony and excess.  By Monday morning I was a very, very solid 210.  Again.  I can’t begin to express the disappointment staring back at me from the mirror.  Thing is, I know this about me – one is too many (which also applies to my prolific ETOH consumption until 16 or 17 years ago).  One may be the thin end of the wedge but for me it also carries  a sledgehammer to drive that wedge to the breaking point.

Today being Thursday it is Doughnut Day at work, the source of my last implosion.  This time I re-directed the tasty treats into someone else’s office leaving mine uninfected.  I closed and locked my door, closed the blinds, put my earplugs up my nose and stared at my screen.  Okay that’s not quite true but I did consciously avoid them and I prevailed!  I escaped the day with nary a bite consumed and my dignity intact.  I should note that I was not the only doughnut abstainer.  Adam too was fighting the doughnut demons today and ordinarily I would take a moment to congratulate a man who’s successfully dropped more than 55 pounds this year….wait, I guess I just did.

For those in the know – Today is Thursday and you – well, you know.   Thanks for reading.

To chasing down rabbits and beating your Kryptonite!